Hey Asshat,
I could excuse it the first time you dropped your entire Guinness in my lap, since I suppose accidents do happen. That is I could have IF you hadn’t immediately grabbed your iPhone, said “Ohmigod I hope I didn’t break it”, and then only apologize because you felt my burning glare. I will not, however, excuse the subsequent water and Bud Lite you also thrust in my direction. The worst part of this is that you appeared to be approximately 80% sober, thereby destroying any excuse you had for acting like a clumsy asshat.
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